More Why's

I don't often use these words, but lately ...
I am mad.
I am angry.
I am sad.
I am scared.
I am devastated.
I am heart-broken.
And frankly just pissed-off.

At who or what,
I don't know.

And why?
I don't know that for sure either.

What I do know is that I am having more survivors guilt. 
And I hate that these things are happening to friends I care about.

I found out yesterday that my old high school seminary teacher and friend, Dave Thurston passed away. We have been in touch throughout the years, especially after I was diagnosed, and a few months ago he reached out to me.  He told me he had just been diagnosed with stage IV pancreatic cancer. It was very advanced.  The doctors were giving him 6 months. That was just over 2 months ago.  I will be forever grateful that my family and I were stuck in traffic on the freeway one weekend in December last year.    Trying to pass the time I was scrolling through Facebook and noticed that he posted a picture of miles of backed-up cars.  I showed it to Ryan and mentioned how it looked a lot like where we were.  Ryan decided to see if he could find the exact spot the picture was taken from by looking for the license plate and vehicle in the center of the picture.  Sure enough he found Bro T sitting in his big rig, stuck in traffic, too.  Ryan called me and I quickly ran back, just a few dozen cars, and hopped into his truck.  Call it fate or destiny, chance or luck - I will call it serendipitous. Dave and I were able to sit and talk for hours about the past, kids and all the crazy things going on in both our lives now.  I will always treasure this last visit and remember his warm smile and incredible laugh. Thanks for being such a great teacher and caring friend Brother Thurston. I will miss you.

Also-

Yesterday one of my friends, Ryan, from support group had a PET scan followed by an appointment with her oncologist.  Her cancer is back and it is in her lymph nodes and has spread to some of her bones.  She was diagnosed about 8 months before me.  Same type of cancer.  Now she is Stage IV.  She was the first "cancer friend" I met.  She helped me so much in the beginning when I was first diagnosed.  I would text her random questions about things I didn't know or understand and she would always have time to answer me and give invaluable advice.  She welcomed me into group and made me feel supported, loved and not so alone.  My heart aches that she has to go through it all over again; port surgery, heart scans, new doctors, new meds and chemotherapy!  This woman is an amazing mother and an incredible teacher and caring friend. She is funny and strong and compassionate and brave, and honestly  - cancer picked the wrong chick to mess with because she is going to kick its @$$!!!  I totally love and admire you Ryan.

My 15 Minutes of Fame

A few weeks ago I went a beam signing for the new cancer wing at the hospital. 

There I met a lady who worked for the 

Communications Department at IHC.  

She asked me if I would be willing to 

share my story for their newsletter.  

Well here it is  - my 15 minutes of fame.

 https://intermountainhealthcare.org/blogs/topics/transforming-healthcare/2017/10/my-breast-cancer-story-kimberly-rosenberg/

My Breast Cancer Story: Kimberly Rosenberg

It was a hot June day when 35-year-old Kimberly Rosenberg answered a call from her doctor. What she heard on the other end of the line changed her life forever: “The test came back positive. You have breast cancer, Kim.” 

Kimberly was 9 months pregnant when she was diagnosed

Are Yuiz.

“I don’t know what happened after that,” Kimberly says. “My mind just didn’t process it. I remember crying and that’s about it.”

Kimberly was a mom of three and nine months pregnant at the time of her diagnoses in 2014. While playing with her children one day, she was accidentally hit in the chest. She shrugged off the pain at first, but then worried when it wouldn’t go away.   

“I was feeling the area and found a lump,” she says. “I didn’t think too much of it. I thought it was just related to pregnancy and hormones. I had an OB appointment coming up, so I figured I’d just ask her. Everything kind of snowballed after that.”

After finding out the lump was indeed cancer, things happened quickly for Kimberly. She gave birth to a healthy baby boy three days after getting the call, and then treatments began two weeks after that at Intermountain Dixie Regional Medical Center. Kimberly’s life was then filled with chemotherapy, radiation and various surgeries — including a double mastectomy and hysterectomy.

“I had my biggest surgery in January 2017,” she says. “It’s called the DIEP flap. You spend a week in the hospital, and then it probably took about four months to recover. They basically cut you open from hip to hip and dissect your stomach — tissue, skin, fat, and muscles — and use this to do breast reconstruction. The surgery was a little over 10 hours. It’s a big surgery. Now I am doing fantastic, I had a surgery in July and hopefully my last one in December.”

Fighting cancer and raising a young family is not an easy task, but Kimberly found strength through her caregivers, loved ones — especially her husband and mother — and the friends she met in a local breast cancer support group.

“One of the best support systems for me was Jilynne Hafen, the social worker at Dixie Regional,” she says. “I have cried in her office more times than I can count. She’s got me through some really hard times. The support group is also invaluable to me. We’re always trying to find other women who are going through the same thing. We don’t want anyone to feel alone or confused.” 

When her treatments began, Kimberly received several care packages from loved ones full of treats, blankets, water bottles and other useful items. She said it’s the little things that mean the most, like even a quick text from a friend. “I love getting an occasional text, email or phone call that just says, ‘Hey, we’re thinking about you and hope you’re doing OK,’” Kimberly says. “That really gives me a push and motivation. It keeps me going.”

Kimberly is getting better and better every day, and she doesn’t let breast cancer define her. She enjoys spending time with her family in the great outdoors, and looks forward to skiing — both water and snow — again when she fully heals. “I’m excited to get back into skiing,” she says. “I’ve had to take a two-year hiatus. Maybe next year I can return to all the activities I love.” 

For information on breast cancer services at Dixie Regional, visit http://bit.ly/2xeSmGI.